4 weeks pregnant

As I’m writing this I’m 4 weeks pregnant but when you see this I’ll be much later into my pregnancy because we are not telling anyone until later. I found out I was pregnant at 3 weeks and 6 days. My roll over day is every Friday which is so easy to remember and super helpful.I took a test at 3 weeks and 6 days and this was my response straight away.First thing I did was download a pregnancy app on my phone to work out my due date and how far I was.The app I’ve downloaded is called “pregnancy”I booked my first doctors appointment and got the confirmation I already knew which was we are pregnant. Got sent for bloods and booked in for my first scan.So far I don’t feel pregnant at all! Just extra bloated which I remember with my first born ( man that’s weird to say ) I also was very bloated in my first trimester, and for some reason both times have made me emtional about being extra bloated.Towards the end of my 4 weeks of pregnancy I did begin to feel very hormonal and finding it hard to control my emotions. Which with my first pregnancy I didn’t experience this at all so it has been hard to adjust too.But my engrey levels have been high and feeling fine! I think the only weird thing to happen this week has been a family member announced their due date is also the 24th just one month before us!?

Not just a regular mum 💌

We are pregnant!!

On August the 15th we found out the good news!

We thought we were going to wait until I was 12 weeks but we can’t control ourselves.I told the work girls this past week as morning sickness has been horrible and a dear work friend and moving far away and one is going to have her baby, I’m the prankster of the group at work so when it was announced they honestly thought it was a joke but then the excitement slowly kicked in.We told my family on father’s day here in Australia Day which seemed like the perfect time. My grandparents were over the moon and my sisters in stock hahaha.I can’t wait to share all about my pregnancy and finally be writing on my blog again, I’m hoping you will join me in this crazy new chapter of my life!Not just a regular mum 💌

No more bullsh*t parenting

My son is now one and half, I officially have a toddler and I finally feel like I have my feet grounded into motherhood.

When I first entered motherhood I found it to be very challenging and I was very overwhelmed for the most part. Social media has so much say into how people parent and the do’s and don’t. I remember when I first gave birth to my son and tried to breastfeed, if you haven’t had a read of my breastfeeding journey I’ll leave a link down below. But long story short I unfortunately couldn’t breastfeed for long and eventually had to turn to full time formula feeds and this broke me, all you see on social media is women taking to breastfeeding with ease and when I was pregnant that’s all i hoped for. When I couldn’t breastfeed anymore I felt like I had failed, I was ashamed to tell people my son was no longer breastfeeding. I look back on my breastfeeding journey and I laugh how I thought it was going to be this easy natural journey for me and in reality it wasn’t and I also strongly believe more women need to be educated about breastfeeding and just having helpful tips and advice to make the journey smoother for women is very much needed.

a year has passed and I had no idea about my son who was soon after I stopped breastfeeding having a dairy allergy and also very bad colic but I think this is where more women need to be honest, real & raw about all this and stop sugar coating things on social media.

Honestly I’m that friend that tells their pregnant friend the truths but also isn’t that annoying women who tells them everything because i know every birth and child is different.

When I follow other mothers on Instagram I look for the real women, I look for the accounts that they post the good, bad & ugly sides of parenting. I wish people shared more of the real and honest side of transitioning into parenthood and not make it look so glamorous. I love being Lorenzo’s mother and I’ve learnt about strengths I didn’t even know I had and fears I didn’t know existed but when did it become so taboo to not be real about how different your life will become once you add a child into your world.

Transitioning into parenthood is this wonderful but super terrifying all at the same time your whole world changes! The way you think, the way you feel and the way you act. I’m only young I’m 25 and I’ve had to grow up heaps since being a mother. Yes I was already mature but I mean like I had to really really grow up! I had to stop leaving the washing pile up and actually do it and hang it out to dry, I had to learn how to cook food which I used to only cook basic stuff but having a son who is on a dairy free diet makes you have to really think about what to cook before cooking.

I had to learn to be me again and not just a mother but add a little bit of me before kids and a me now with a kid. I had to learn how to love Hayden because even that changes when you become a parent. There’s actually so much that changes that most people don’t see on social media but I’m thankful that more and more women are sharing more of the real life stuff and not making parenthood out to be all rainbows and sunshine’s because that’s only about 30% of parenting and the other 50% is the real stuff the my child pooped in the bath, threw a tantrum in public kinda parenting!

My breastfeeding struggle

Not just a regular mum 💌

Am I ready for baby number two?

I always thought I wanted a big age gap between my kids and that I wouldn’t want to try for our second until my son was at kindy. That soon changed and both Hayden and I have been on that baby train lately. One night we found ourselves sitting and talking about when and all the in betweens for baby number two. For my work I’m a educator and usually in a room but when I came back from having a baby my role changed a little and I haven’t been in my own room I’ve been in other educators rooms helping them. But because of this Hayden I knew that if we want to try for baby number two then this would be the year just because I’m not as important at work but things could change again next year. Also with his job things are finally looking up and he’s officially at the end and coming into a massive pay jump ” a good pay jump” so to us it just kind of made sense to try this year.

Our first month came to try and we did and to be honest the feeling of scared came more to mind then anything? I was more scared of what others would think and have people no understand why we want a second so soon after our first or scared to tell my parents we are trying or even my friends. I don’t why this was even a thought because it’s not there life to live it’s mine and everyone is different but I was scared.

That scared feeling soon went away when I was a week late which for me is not uncommon so I didn’t over think and I just continued to wait. Two weeks had passed and still no period in sight and yet I wasn’t rushing to go out and buy a pregnancy test instead Hayden and I kept it to ourselves and just acted as normal. For our second time around we want to surprise everyone and keep it a secret and have cute ways to tell everyone. So no one knew but us too. Then two weeks came to three and both Hayden and I said this is definitely it. We couldn’t believe that our first try we would already be pregnant it was crazy fast for us.

I had flashbacks from finding out with Lorenzo I was a only a week old and the positive came up straight away and I actually didn’t believe it so I did two more just to double check because I was low key freaking out.

The next day I went out and bought a pregnancy test and was so nervous to open it and pee on the stick but I did and to my surprise it was negative I couldn’t believe it because I was three whole weeks late and not even my usual signs of my period had even come yet. I remember feeling confused and upset because I was getting so excited to have a new child in our family, someone to teach Lorenzo to be kind and gentle with and love and for me also I feel I missed out on the enjoyment of the newborn stage because of my heath at the time so I was so excited to do it the second time around and enjoy every moment the good and bad.

I showed Hayden and even he was bad a hiding his sad face which in return broke me he’s definitely waiting for a little girl to complete our family. After a few hours we both realised this was only the start and that we already had so much to be thankful for with having one child because we are very aware of the struggles many families face to just have one.

But all this still didn’t explain why I was still late. We went on being four weeks late when my period finally showed up snd I had decided to book to see my doctor because for me something wasn’t right with my body. But unfortunately there wasn’t much they could do, all my bloods came back fine and didn’t show anything and they didn’t push it further. I guess we will never know what or why my body did what it did. But we have decided to put our baby making on hold and we both decided that we want to focus on a few other things before we try again and have already got the ball rolling on other fun projects coming our way.

but I also look back on our experience and have realised that maybe we were a little blind to see that trying for our second child isn’t just about trying but there’s so many factors we have to consider And at the time our heads were only thinking about holding a little baby again in our arms and not about the big picture.

we don’t know what the future holds for us or if there will be more trying to come or a second baby next year or if this is just a sign that it won’t be as easy as we hoped it would be to try. But what we do know is we are healthy, happy and thankful for Lorenzo and it’s ok that it hasn’t gone to plan so far and I guess this is just life.

not just a regular mum 🌈