As I sit here and start to write up this blog that’s been on my to do list for a while, I’m struggling to find a “catchy” title.. a title that brings in my followers and makes you want to read this blog. But all that comes into my mind is motherhood, this is motherhood this is how I parent my two year old.
Before I get into what this blog is actually about “even if your confused” it will all make sense very soon.i promise. I want to “sell” myself again I guess.. I’m a 26 year old women who is a mother to a little boy named Lorenzo Robert Caesar who is two and a very inderpent little boy who knows what he wants, I’m also a wife both my hunny and I have been together for seven years and we are far from perfect but we work well togther as a couple and a team when it comes to parenting. Our world is about to become a whole lot busyer as I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant with our baby girl. Oh and we have a very active dog named zues! And that’s how we became the “Caesar family.”
When we firsted welcomes our son into this crazy thing we call life, our whole world changed the way we were as a couple and how we handled situations changed. Before hubby and I had children we really struggled with how we communicated with each other, a lot of it was me and bringing my past relationships into every situation which for better understanding, my relationship before hubby was with a guy who only saw me “so to speak” when we had fights and we had big fights. Our whole relationship “if you can even call it that.” Was just fighting every day it was a very toxic and unhappy environment which is all I’ll go into detail about. But with hubby I really took those unhealthy habits from my past and just couldn’t shake them from what was a amazing relationship, too the point a broke up with my hubby because he was too nice which it wasn’t until he was gone for me to see and realise he was everything I needed and more.
When we used to have a fight it was always me who would just blow up straight away and it wasn’t until later on when I realised that was me just putting those walls up straight away and trying to protect myself.. hubby soon realised what I was doing and every time we had a fight or disagreement at the beginning of our relationship he would always try and reassure me that this was try a disagreement and we would work it out and be ok.
Fast forward a few years and now we are parents the way we have disagreements is completely different. When we first became parents we both really had to adjust and this of course meant learning how to parent togther which was hard at first, but two years later we finally have it togther “sometimes.” We sat down one night and spoke about everything and one thing we both could agree on what what we said in front of our children would have long lasting effects and that we didn’t want to put any negative impact on our children.
For us this means when we both disagree with each other at the time and are in front of anyone we just have this “look” I can’t explain the look but we just know each other’s looks and it’s like we make a sticky note about it in our heads and always bring it up when we are in privite rather air our laundry in front of our son or friends and family. This works well for us and trust me it took as a really long time to get to that place of we both sir down and let each other have our say rather just both thinking we are right and the other person is wrong.
I truly am a believer that once you and your partner have found each other’s “love language” and a way to communicate each other’s frustrations in positive ways, it shows in how you parent and work with each other then without.
But please don’t take this as I think we have work out and cracked parenting and our relationship and think we are perfect because trust me we probably do more “wrong” then “right” sometimes but I’m saying it works for us. This is our journey into parenthood and marriage and hubby and I have both have been very intentional with how we communicate and parent our children. We both look at our journey and where we have come from to where we are now and what/ how we want our children to see us and remember.
Our parenting style is simple we choose to do things togther, we put our family first. The way we couple is also simple we choose to always communicate togther and listen and not air our dirty laundry in front of ours but with each other.
When I say we parent togther I really do mean this. One thing we asked each other when we first gave birth to our son Lorenzo was “how do we want our children to grow.?” For us it was simple we both agreed that we wanted our children to always feel loved no matter what. We want out children to grow up remembering those little things such as the extra cuddles, extra time spent at the dinner tables being more internal with our children and always putting them first. For us this means we both tuck our son in at night, we both kiss him and say we love him, we both teach our son right from wrong, we both spend that one on one time with him.
When our sweet baby girl comes we both know we will have to change and adjust to a family of four but I believe we can and we will be just as successful with how we cope with whatever life gives us just as much as we already are now.
The Caesar family ♡