As the weeks keep moving along and I keep getting closer and closer to giving birth I’m slowly finding myself more and more scared for all the unknowns.
Yes I’ve been through child birth before so I know what to expect this time so that part doesn’t scare me as much, but after child birth after the hospital and when we finally get to go home part!? That’s what scares me the most… hubby just had a massive change in careers “for the better of our family and future.” But with this it means he only just began full time work with his new company so any chance of him having time off to help is a thing of the past. This wasn’t our plan for him to get a new job as he had one already that paid good. But this new company asked for him, his boss had to fight for him a little and already he has been given so many benefits that no other company has ever offered him before. So we know it was the right move for our family but yes it doesn’t make it easier for me knowing he will have two days with me in hospital and straight back at work.
My next thing that I’m scared about is if I’ll even be a good mother to two children, I don’t want Lorenzo to feel left out or that he’s not loved because he will always be my first born and my baby boy. How do parents split there love between children? How do mothers get two children in the car at the same time with such ease and grace? How does your toddler sleep at night well a new born baby wakes up 3 times a night? This is where my mind is traveling too right now. This is where I begin to get scared thinking about the unknow. So yes the weeks are going much faster until her arrival but I just wish they would slow down a little bit. I wish I could breath for a second, spend a little more time with my sweet baby boy before our world is changed forever.
This weeks pregnant systems:
• leg cramps in my sleep “So painful.”
• waking up at nights and having trouble sleeping
• pee stops a lot!
• mood swings very emotional
• pelvis pain as she is now head down and I find the more I walk the lower she goes and the more painful it gets.
• can’t bend at all as my reflux gets worse.
• shooting sharp pains straight down
• cold and flu symptoms at night, sore throat but I’m fine durning the day.
I’m off to see my OB next week when I’m 35 weeks pregnant so I’m excited to see what will happen and what he has to say about baby girl, at our last check up she was head down and he had said she will now probably stay head down until she’s ready to come which didn’t mean was soon just meant that she’s in the correct position and when it was time she would come. Everything was looking good and healthy which I was super happy about. So I can’t wait to see what this check up with my OB will bring.
Bring on 35 weeks pregnant!